Lovers-Loversan in Paris

Para kay Mr. Han-

na maraming karanasan sa buhay

pero walang masayang alaala.

Iniiwan na kita.

Ang hirap mo kasing mahalin...

    
    Sorry, wrong send. 

   At saka si Martin nga pala ako at hindi ko dapat kina-career ang linya ni Vivian. Gusto kong mag-explain dahil ako'y naiinis pero next time na lang at saka hindi naman mahalaga ang sasabihin ko as usual.

  Alam mo, wala na akong panahon pag-isipan ang mga nangyari sa akin - sa atin, lately. 

   On the one hand, ok na rin na less ang pagkikita natin. Familiarity breeds contempt daw eh. Saka s'yempre nagtatrabaho naman tayo pare-pareho. Hell, we need to work. And we smile and greet other people. But then, nakaka-miss lang yung aimless talking that we tend to do less now. What with limited time(slash)time, always tired and all...

     But you know what, after all is said and done, I'm still amazed at how things constantly surprise us in every bend, putting this decidedly "friendly, non-committing, unconditional, not romantic love" to test. I'm amazed at how I still hold on to everything after surges of pain and/or hormonal imbalances. I'm amazed at how deep the roots have become over time, how intricate the tangles have gone in every direction. I'm amazed at how I get scared leaving the dream I dreamed with you. 

     Should time come and while my other world threatens to dominate, ayokong lamunin ulit ako ng dati kong mundo - bihagin ng mga lumang panaginip na naging bangungot, ng pag-ibig na naging hapdi, ng buhay na pag-iral lamang.

     While I don't really feel like our world is slipping away, I'm forever checking myself if I haven't reverted back to my old self. Masaya na ako sa mundong ginawa ko kasama kayo. Lagi akong babalik at magtatampisaw sa "kakarampot na dalampasigan" ng mababaw na talong ito. Kahit malunod pa at dito matagpuan ang katapusan ko.

     No apologies and no thank you's this time. Just want to tell you that I'm still around despite the scarcity of time and the widening of space. And that I still care pretty much the same, if not more.

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sulat ng isang kaibigan pagkatapos ng laho